Ruben de Ronde
Artwork Brendan de Clercq
The Journey of a DJ Between Highs and Lows From Musical Dream to Reality
Ruben de Ronde is living the dream of many young musicians. As a DJ and producer, he performs on the biggest stages in the world, from Ultra Music Festival to Tomorrowland. But behind the success lies a mental struggle that many artists in the dance industry recognize. The extreme highs of performing stand in stark contrast to the loneliness that can follow.
“One moment you’re playing for 15,000 people, the next you’re sitting alone in a hotel room,” says Ruben. “You go from a huge dopamine rush to complete silence. You have to learn to process that contrast.”
Mental Health
Art Tour
Dealing with Rejection and Disappointment
The road to success is not without obstacles. Ruben knows all too well how painful it can be to pour your heart and soul into a track only to face rejection. "You work on a song for months, believing in it completely, only to receive no response or be told it's 'not good enough.'"
How does he cope? By talking about it. "At first, I felt ashamed. You start questioning yourself: 'Am I not good enough?' But by talking to other artists, I realized we all face the same struggles. It's not personal; it's just part of the process." Setting goals also helps. "I believe in manifesting. Not everything works out right away—sometimes it takes years for a dream to come true. Playing at Tomorrowland was one of those dreams. And eventually, it became reality."
Learning to Enjoy the Moment
Despite his success, Ruben remains critical of himself. "The problem in the dance industry is that everything moves so fast. You build up to a performance, and before you know it, it's over. And then comes the question: 'Was this the last time? Will I ever get back here?' I need to learn to enjoy the moment more."
Music as an Emotional Outlet
For Ruben, music is not just a job but also a way to process emotions. Surprisingly, he doesn’t always listen to dance music in his free time but instead enjoys Norwegian pop. "My girlfriend is Norwegian, and their music is melancholic and pure. Artists like Maria Mena really move me. When I'm not feeling great, that music helps me."
A Support Network in the Dance Industry
The DJ world can be lonely, but there is also a strong sense of support. During the COVID-19 pandemic, a WhatsApp group with 200 DJs was created, an initiative by Armin van Buuren. "Everyone was struggling with the same mental challenges. Some felt useless without shows, others battled depression or anxiety. We realized we weren’t alone."
Maintaining Mental Health
For Ruben, keeping his mental health in check is crucial. "Walking helps me a lot. Just stepping away from the studio, the screens, the industry. Going outside, to the beach or the forest."
The discipline from his childhood also plays a role. "As a kid, I did judo. It taught me how to handle rejection and keep pushing forward. That mindset still helps me today."
A Message for Young People
For young people struggling mentally, Ruben has a clear message:"You are not alone. Talking helps. There are always people who want to support you, even if it doesn’t feel that way. Seek help, share your feelings, and remember: it gets better."
